“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
Matthew 6:25-33
I have always been fiercely independent and successful at achieving my goals. Most would applaud such an accomplishment, but there are others who have learned that independence has its pitfalls. I was a slow learner. My success hid the fact that I had fallen into the trap of self-sufficiency, refusing to ask for help because I had everything under control.
Stumbling into the trap of self-sufficiency was effortless for me. Self-sufficiency felt like a shield against the pain of past betrayal - a failsafe plan against ever being hurt again. I traded the risk of trusting others to provide for the safety of handling everything on my own?
Self-sufficiency is a common trap set of the enemy, leading us to the false belief that we don't need help. It is so convincing that we even begin to shy away from trusting God's desire to provide all our needs. This may sound extreme, but I wonder what we would find if we looked beneath the surface of our driven quest to do it all with little help.
When I looked, I discovered a false belief that no one deemed me worthy enough to lend a helping hand. A belief born from childhood trauma that spilled over into my adult life and then plastered itself onto my image of God. If I had been left alone with no support as a child, why would God bother to provide for me as an adult?
Over time, God has renewed my thinking as he dissected and dismantled this lie. On certain days, the reality of God's provision comes as a memory of loving kindness in difficult moments. At other times, the truth comes as God revamps the purpose of a defense mechanism that once served to keep me safe but now serves to glorify him. Frequently, it comes as a wave of compassion to sooth the sting of wounds that can be healed but never undone.
Each time I become aware of God's past, present, and future provision, a peace settles over me that allows me to rest. This inner calm enables me to wait with anticipation for God's next move so that I can faithfully follow his plan using the resources he provides.
When you delve beneath the surface of your inner motivations, what do you discover? Which aspects of your life require a healing touch from God, enabling you to fully embrace his timing and openly receive all that God desires to give you?
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